Who wears a wallet chain?!
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
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