I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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