dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
