He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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