i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
