What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
