Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
