So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
