My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
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