I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
