i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
now i know why i became what i already was.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
