Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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