If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
