Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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