3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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