I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
