Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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