the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
