Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize
