i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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