She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
