well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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