have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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