Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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