She is in my trunk
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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