Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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