I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize