How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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