new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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