i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Mom said you looked used
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize