Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Randomize
