it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
