Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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