I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
