she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
