apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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