He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
