what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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