okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Randomize
