We named our party play list daddy issues
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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