I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
my sisters under your porch take her home
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
