Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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