Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize