Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize