no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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