worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
