How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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