There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
