Whod you bang
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Just invented taco cereal.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
