More tranny stories later!
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
In other news, I just burned my penis
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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